TYPO OF THE WEEK
Real Mistakes, Real Laughs:

Air bases were built on captured islands of Tinian, Saipan, and Guam but they were barley within the range of the long-range bombers.

(hope the bombadiers weren't on gluten-free diets)
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Didn't catch the typo? Scroll to bottom of page

Friday, July 17, 2009

Nothing Says "Trust" Like a Piece of Paper In Your Eye

There is nothing wrong with your [monitor]. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission [of this very disturbing image]...You are about to experience the awe and mystery which reaches from the inner mind to... The Outer Limits of Crossing Polansky...

Since donning my first pair of eyeglasses at age seven, eye doctors and vision professionals have figured largely in my life. From kindly old Dr. Skirball (whom my brother once called Dr. Eyeball by mistake -- there must be an unwritten rule that a doctor's last name determines their specialty. Cases in point: orthopedist Dr. Shin and hand surgeon Dr. Nalebuff. I'm not kidding.) in the early 1960s to respected Dr. Maria Scott, who ten years ago changed my life forever in only three minutes with a simple laser beam. Medical and technological improvements in today's eye and vision care range from pleasing (no more "puff" (read: "blast") of air at close range on your eyeball to check for glaucoma) to miraculous (cataract replacement surgery and LASIK vision correction).
I gave my trust over to each and every one of those eye care professionals -- my 20/400 uncorrected vision depended on it. So when optometrist Nikki Meadows wanted to measure my tear production, I didn't have a moment's pause, even when she gently hooked the little paper equivalent of a dipstick on my lower eyelid and bade me close my eyes for five minutes. After all, I'd had my eyelids everted, my pupils dilated, my eyeballs "puffed", and my retinas cut. What's the big deal about a little dipstick? I only wished I could have opened my eyes to see how funny it must have looked.
Technology the rescue...Dr. Meadows obligingly took a picture with her cell phone.
Why am I sharing this random, banal anecdote that's immortalized in one of the most hideous photos I've ever taken? For no other reason than to give you the same laugh it gave me, and to add that anyone looking for superlative eye and vision care should visit the Chesapeake Laser & Eye Care Center in Annapolis, Maryland. Any one of the practitioners in this group is top-notch for eye care, but for the discerning patient who also seeks a medical modeling career, my money's on Dr. Nikki Meadows every time.

www.cynthiapolansky.com

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